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Can I ask for some prayers?


ImaginaryRain

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Things have been rocky for us for awhile. Last year, May/June/July were a very bad "hell on earth" for us that I won't get into. December 6th, the day before my birthday, my husband was laid off. We've been struggling ever since. He did find a new job in January, but we ended up living more off tax return money then not- it became clear we could NOT rely on that job to even pay rent, let alone bills. In May or June I found out our marriage was (to my surprise!) in a bad way, to boot.

So my husband recently went back to doing long haul over the road trucking in an attempt to make ends meet. But he's just getting started back up in it, and we were already in a bad way. We've already had help from family members, I don't think we can get more. But it looks like we may not be able to manage rent this month. Definately not July's bills. If we could get even one month of decent paychecks, we'd be good :welcome:

I've been looking for work, but no one wants to hire me. It's just one thing after another anymore, and in all honesty, I'm so depressed anymore that I've lost interest in pretty much everything except burying my nose in a book. Nathan, however, is doing wonderfully- he's young enough that he's clueless. He misses his Daddy, but is pretty ok with things except when we actually have to say goodbye. I'm tired, and worn, and worried sick.

Please just spare us some "good" vibes? Things keep getting more and more out of shape, and there's small things going on all the time that just feel like fate is having a good laugh at us. I'd be very thankful for any prayers, good vibes, helpful energy sent our way.

And we're really in for it this week just on a basic level- high 90's temps, even 100 or 100+, and no AC. Second story apartment, and they recently lopped the tops off the trees (there went our minimal shade o.o) - it's gonna be nasty.

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Oh crud Charissa.

I'm really sad to hear that. I'll light a candle and send some good energy towards your way in Oregon.

I know you might feel alone in all of this right now but, trust me, your story can be heard in tha back yards of many peeps in this country right now.

It still really sucks, I know but, maybe it will help to know there is a chorus behind you.

(((hugs)))

Monica

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Prayers for things to turn around soon for you. Can you get housing or help with rent. Sometimes Saint Vincent DePaul will help. Don't be too proud to use food stamps or what ever you need to get by.

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Charissa, my heart goes out to you. Please do take the suggestion above and check out food stamps and other social programs available to you in Oregon. In KC we have a program that gives fans to people without air conditioning; maybe your area does something similar. Also help with rent etc while you get squared away. I know it's easier to dive into a book ... believe me, I've read/hidden in libraries full in my time! But a little time spent looking for agencies that can help will go a long way to helping you, both financially and emotionally.

Please don't be shy about posting here. The collective experience of the members and their concern for your wellbeing and that of your family are here for you to draw upon. :flowers: :welcome: :)

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I am so sorry, Charissa.I know what you're going through..been there. Another place you could go for help is the Salvation Army.They helped us. I'm sending you unlimited strength, courage and wisdom to help you get through all this. You're not alone...I hold you in my heart, as do many others around the world. I pray that you will be able to search for the help you need. Please don't give up.

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We do have food stamps, though not much- our case worker decided she would NOT review our case again, and that messed things up. This despite my husband explaining that the review month she was using held not only 5 pay checks, but the one week in over a month that he'd had a run of good work at his ex-employer! I need to call and leave a message with the supervisor, or some such, come Monday. It complicates things that she's only ever spoken with my husband, and I don't know what was said exactly.

That aside, I've been trying to find info on home loans and the like. We've decided this renting thing is for the birds- and if we can find someplace we can afford, we're going for it. Bad credit & low income- makes it harder to do. We have to be really careful and do not have a high amount we can shoot for.

It is nice to know you're all here, and thinking of me and mine. It's been rotten for so long- I swear every time I think things are going to get better, it gets worse! I'm surprised I haven't busted up crying yet. I feel like it, but... I seriously HATE to do it, and there's just too much I need to do. Clean, take care of Nathan, make sure things get done...

Today though- I twisted my ankle while trying to help a woman this afternoon, and I thought it was ok. It's not- it's hard to walk and it HURTS. Hopefully it'll be better with some rest! Just one more thing! I can't drive with my ankle like this- guess it's fate's way of telling me I really SHOULD stay home and keep as much money as I can saved back- even if it means I really have to get inventive to feed us!

I hate the thought that this is not a "unique" situation- We've recently had 2 sets of neighbors (across, and below) move out. The apartment Manager told my husband a lot of people are moving out or getting an extra roomie just to make ends meet. It's really bad- our rent isn't that awfully high, but so many people are suffering layoffs, it's seriously alarming. My brother has been out of work since the week after Thanksgiving, and he has a college degree!

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I will keep you in my prayers and sending you lots of mini hugs...hang in there there is always light at the end of the tunnel...I know here there's places you can go to get help...check with your Food Stamp case worker they should be able to help you...or at least tell you where help could be available to you...

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Charissa..there's nothing wrong with having a real good cry. On one of my trips to the hospital, I was in such pain that I couldn't keep the tears back, and the nurse told me to let it all out. Now when things get to me, I pick my time and place, and when I'm alone I have a good cry. I feel sad while I'm crying, but afterwards I feel a bit better, and usually have a sleep afterwards. Crying doesn't mean you're weak. There are chemicals in our tears that are healing...and anyway, if we weren't supposed to cry, why do we have tears? It's good to get rid of some of the stress. My best to you. gentle hugs.

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I hear you.

You should find out about the local food pantry in your area. Also look up Angel food ministries online and see if they have a local food co-op at one of your local churches.

My thoughts will go out to you.

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Sending oodles of positive thoughts and energy your way Charissa. :)

I have been <and still am at times> in that very same place you are. I just keep tying knots in the end of my rope and hanging on. Not always easy, but beats the alternative. I agree with havin' the good cry part - get it out of you, then pick up and get on. And if you know someone who can always make you laugh - search them out - laughter is a great stress reliever. Sometimes you just need to laugh when life keeps throwing curveballs at ya. It doesn't solve the problems, but it sure makes you feel better for the moment.

I would take the advice of other forum members and contact the groups they have mentioned. There is help out there for those that need it - stick to your guns and make them listen, and never be ashamed to ask for the help. My DH's work pays sporadically <at best> and we never know month to month what will come in. He works steadily, but we never know when his clients will pay - so some months are pretty good, and others you wonder how to get through on next to nothing. In the end, it always seems to balance out somehow. Makes life interestin', if nothing else :welcome: :flowers: First and foremost, keep your family together and strong.

I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers and wishing you all the best.

BIG {{hugs}}

Chris

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Please add me to the list of people that are keeping you and your family in their prayers

and many good wishes! Life sure can be so hard at times but don't give up and take it lying down. Keep a positive outlook and little by little things will change. Thought are things! Bless you!!

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I have no practical advice to offer Charissa as I don't understand the US benefits system but on a personal level I hope you find the strength to get through this rocky period because that's all it will be, a difficult period in time. Life in my experience is a series of hills and valleys and if we didn't have the downs we would never recognise the ups. I have been in both extreme places in terms of happiness and every little nook and cranny in between. I do hope that things start to turn the corner and get better for you quickly. I will be thinking of you and sending my best wishes your way.

One practical thought just popped into my head. Over here we have some service exchange groups where you can do something for a neighbour in exchange for something that you want from them. This appears to work well for people who are not able to work in a regular job. The kind of things I m think of are doing gardening or shopping or sewing - or anything that you are good at in exchange for e.g. vegetables from the garden that you tend or a % of the shopping that you carry home or making curtains for someone who might offer plumbing or electrical services in exchange.

That may be no help at all but just a thought.

Jo

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Charissa -

You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. Living in Canada, I'm not sure what services are available for you. If someone contacts my office (I work for a city councillor), I refer them to one of our social services workers who assist them in finding available resources.

Also phone or walk over to one of your local churches. I know that our church has a fund to assist neighbours in need. The local churches also sometimes have a stock pile of diapers and food. It might be worth checking out. Churches can also help you to get in contact with agencies that can be of assistance during this difficult period.

Give Nathan a hug. A child is such a blessing, and I know God will help you look after him.

Hugs

-Susanne

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Working up a batch of good, healing energy and extra helpings of positive thoughts! :wave:

I'm so sorry that you are going through such a rough patch - this year was supposed to be a good year - because last year was so bad - but it seems to be even worse this year for so many people. I can empathise with you, I really can.

Let Nathan be your sunny place - as he hasn't picked up on the tension, you can share in his happiness. Enjoy the quiet times - if he gives you any - and remember to laugh along with his childish delights. Thank goodness he is there. Looking after him will force you to look after yourself. :lol:

Cuddles to you both. :angry:

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Charissa, you and your family are most definitely in my prayers. I have often found that when I just can't deal with something any more, God steps in and finds me a solution I would have never thought of. As hard as it is when everything around you feels so difficult, try to find a place to have a quiet and heart-felt talk with God . . . he never gives up on us, but sometimes we try so hard to fix things ourselves that we don't open up to him and his desire to help us as much as we should. Things haven't been all that great for me lately, either, but I am putting my faith in God and his ability to iron wrinkles out of my life that have stumped me. I also second the opinion that local churches in your area may have outreach programs that can help you - most churches will help someone even if that person doesn't belong to their church. I am sure that all of the prayers being said for you will be heard . . . prayer is a powerful thing, and God cares, so hang in there!

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Charissa- my thoughts go out to you and your family. I'm sending prayers for strength to you.

I hope you can find some kind of help from some nearby service or church or something. I wish I knew your area and where you should go! Do be careful if you consider buying a home- there are a lot of hidden costs, like all kinds of fees you pay at the time of purchase, yearly taxes, and general maintenace stuff like a lawnmower and gas or fixing broken things. Is there any relative you could move in with even for a brief period of time til you guys get back on your feet? Many hugs

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Charissa, my prayers are with you & your family. Please do look into local nonprofit organizations that may be able to help your family. I don't know your area specifically but I do know that various types of assistance can often be found at agencies such as a local United Way, Salvation Army, St. Vincent de Paul, food banks and local churches. The types of assistance offered will vary but when these organizations have the funds they have been known to help with everything from gas to rental assistance, food and prescription medication. If 2-1-1 is available in your area they can be a great source for finding assistance and it is a free call. Calling 2-1-1 (if available in your area) connects you to a referral source for help. If 2-1-1 is not available in your area try calling your local United Way and ask them for a list of nonprofit organizations that may be able to help with your family's needs.

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My friend and I have made a deal. She had to apply for food stamps (she is waiting because they are back logged). I told her I had a membership at BJs. We both like the same kinds of things.

We are going to go together and go halves on certain things. She will save money and I will save money. I do not have the room for the big containers that most of the food comes in from the store. So we can divvy up between us.

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