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06/24/06 My Space


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Do you feel your Teenage child should have there actions on "My Space" (website for teens) determine if they get a Job or be selected to go to a college in the future or not?

There has been a lot of talk about this in the past months and colleges & Head Hunters for companies are checking out "My Space" before the decide to accept people for hire or for candidates for there school.

Do you think it's fair? Do you feel parents should monitor there kids better online?

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I dont feel my teenage child should have an open blog anywhere on the internet!

what she feels and thinks should not be open to the general public.

I feel that no employer or higher educational institution should use the childish antic of children against the adults the have become. it is the childish antics which lead us all into adulthood.

I think if the parent cannot use the internet or the computer they should not allow their child complete and total access to it. I dont believe any child should have a computer with internet access in their rooms.

parents should monitor more closely....

although Catriona uses her PC when I am not in the room it sits next to mine and she knows I know how to access it and find out where she has been. I also have a list of places she likes to visit and her passwords to those places. I dont get the password she dont get to go to the site.

I check her profile regulary and I will toss any photo or greeting I think is inappropriate for my 14 yr old

regaurdless of her rolling eyeballs!

while a child is not aleagal adult it is or job to protect them...even from themselves!

nutti :D

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I definitely don't think this is right. Job companies and colleges searcing for kids on a blog site is akin to going through prospective applicants trash cans to find out what mail they get. And what if a kid doesn't have a My Space web blog.. are they dismissed and not considered for the job or college? I really don't know enough to understand why Employers or colleges would be doing this but it sounds suspect to me and I'm not even sure it's legal.

As far as kids being monitored on the computer - They definitely should be. Even with teens being a savy as they are these days I really don't think a lot of them consider the world to be as scarey a place as it really is. I know when my sister's boys were wanting their own computer it got set up in the kitchen and that's still where it is today, right where the whole family can be together and it's easily monitored by all. It started out for homework (doesn't it always? :D) but now even my brother in law surfs the web on it. It's actually turned into a very cool thing and something the family can share and even play games on together as opposed to something to be done alone in one's room.

-David

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I don't even think that the 'My Space' site should even be up anymore with all the news stories I've seen about it. And it's not right that employers and colleges should use that in anyway for decisions. :D

Greg (DH) and I have talked about our son going on the internet, we don't mind as long as he tells us before he gets on and what sites he goes to. But we have it easy for the simple fact that each of us have a computer (Chris has one in his room for homework and both Greg and I have one downstairs) and the only computers that are online are mine and Greg's. So if Chris wants to go online he has to use one of ours and someone is always in the room for whatever reason. :lol: We already had the question from him 'can I have my computer online in my room so I don't have to use yours?' Greg just looked at him and simply said 'no, and before you start complaining let me tell you why, I am not running phone lines from the basement to the 2nd floor.' Chris couldn't fight with that logic.

It's just getting harder and harder to raise kids now. :lol:

Annette

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I'm so glad it's not an issue for us! I do feel strongly about monitoring children online.

a very cool thing and something the family can share and even play games on together as opposed to something to be done alone in one's room.

I definitely think this is a very smart way to manage a computer.

We were borderline between "Beat" & "Hippy" so we were fairly liberal parents by the standards of the day, but monitoring was done on what was brought in from outside (books, magazines, etc); we never censored anything they read from our library (all of them could read before they started in school) and answered any & all questions they asked.

Because children are innately good and trusting, they are definitely at icreased risk from unscrupulous online preditors, and I'm uncomfortable about any child for whom I'd be legally responsible having unlimited, unsupervised access to the blog site mentioned. I guess y'all are aware that some states' prisons contract to have their inmates fill internet orders? Having done a year of corrections nursing & being locked up with inmates 8-16 hours/ day, I'm really leary of posting anything personal online...

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I definitely feel that children should be monitored closely online. As to whether or not My Space should even be on line, I think they need to upgrade their security considerably. I didn't even know that colleges looked at what kids were posting online--seems kind of stupid when you think it's their grades and school & extra curricular activities & clubs they belong to that they should be interested in--so I rather doubt I would have my child apply to that sort of college.

We have about three computers. Amanda loves to play games on mine or Chris' and that is it...nada. no online chatting, no discussion. Her mother allows her to go online but the parental controls are so tight on her mom's computer she has to ask to go to any sites not on the approval list. It's all about knowing what you kids are doing--and responsibility. We are thinking of letting her have the Mac in her room just to play games on--(I hate computer games and would love to delete them from my computer-- :D I think they are simply a waste of time--) but no internet access.

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I've been watching Dateline's "To Catch a Predator" series and have been shocked by the coverage. The Internet is a very creepy place if you take a wrong turn. I think that parents have an increasingly difficult challenge to keep children in check when seemingly innocent places such as a public library allow unrestricted access to the Internet. I've miss-typed URLs and have ended up in the worse places that won't allow you to back out of them. I'm not a big fan of government regulations, but I think that there needs to be some intervention on this issue.

With this in mind, I was considering limiting the age of our members, but decided against it. I'm very proud that we have a such an outstanding bunch of regular members and I feel 100% confident that if any funny business was going on, that you folks would spot it in a heart beat. I'd like to thank you all for making sure that our community remains a family type atmosphere!

Thanks!

Dean

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Dean I have watched both of those and I find it scarey to see so many men of ALL walks of life showing up at those doors.

I do feel caution should be taken by parents and kids. Kids are so fixed on trying to be independant that they make bad choices sometimes and that is when grown ups prey on them.

I think it should make the kids think twice before they post now knowing that so many recruiters are looking online at there profiles. What they do now can effect there lives in the future and it is sad because I know I did things that I would never tell my boss about :D

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I'm 27 (soon to be 28) and most of my friends have myspace accounts and I access it daily. I have a blog there. But, it is searchable by my name so people (employers) could find me and read what I have to say. Thus, my blogs that are more controversial (I have blog about dating...kind of carrie bradshaw style) is on a different site with an ambiguous 'name' attached to it. I think it's great for kids to be able to use the internet as a virtual 'diary' but encourage them to do so anonymously. I explained this to a friend's daughter recently. I asked her if she kept a diary when she was in elementary school and middle school and she said yes. I asked her what she thought of it now when she went back and read it. She said it was hysterical. I asked her if she'd be embarassed if her friends now read what she wrote back then, she said yes and I asked her how she thought she'd feel in 20 years with her 'diary' online where everyone could read it. She now has an anonymous blog.

You can set myspace so only 'friends' can contact you and to become a 'friend' they have to enter some sort of information like your email address or your last name, etc. They're working on beefing up security some but honestly, all the instant messenger programs and news boards and stuff like that offer the same kind of thing. I get contacted all the time by sleeze-balls.

Even though I'm young and still considered 'hip' by some teeneagers that obviously don't know any better yet, I would definately be tracking my kids online. I was sneaky as a kid. I had a webpage that mom and dad knew about and tracked...so I made a second one too...that they didn't know about. I knew how to erase my 'footprints' online and I definately was pushing the limits of what was safe. That being said, if I had kids, I'd install keystroke monitoring on the computer. I know many of you are thinking what an invasion of privacy that is but you can install it to only tag certain words that are risque or word strings like "let's meet" or "LMIRL" (lets meet in real life). The reason I don't feel like this is too big of an invasion of privacy is this. Before the internet, we all had our diaries and we would have flipped if mom or dad read them. But mom and dad had a much smaller world to deal with. You were exposed to your community and your school and church and maybe a few other areas but really, your world was small. You probably never talked to anyone out of the country and probably rarely anyone out of state. The world is HUGE today for kids. With one click of a mouse, they're off in California or Florida or Mexico... You can't control their 'environment' if you aren't completely sure what they're exposed to.

I have a good friend that has started a pretty sucessful uh...'test'. People with teens online come to her, give her info about their kids, pictures, etc. and she spends a significant amount of time trying to contact them online, if she's able to make contact, she spends time trying to 'get to know them' and then tries to get them to agree to meet her (this is all with their parent knowledge). Out of all the kids she's tested, only 1 passed. She poses as a young girl or an older man or a runaway or whatever it takes to get into the kids' head (it helps that she has a psych degree). Anyway, my point is that monitoring their websites and internet usage is good but don't be afraid to invade privacy on this one. They don't need to know you're doing it until you have to reveal it to head off a potentially catastrophic event.

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Very well put April. I hate reading my diaries from just 12 years ago :p sheesh what seemed important then was important but I would have handled several things differently now that I am older!

It is really something about how kids are talking to folks all around the world in there living room. I had a funny experiance today when I woke up.

I sent an email to about 10 friends last week and I did not send it to NO one from my state that I knew. I had my signature line in it. The other email addresses I sent it this email to was blind copied because I do that because it was a habit from my job years ago so it does not show who else I sent this email to.

Any way, this morning, I received an email through ebay from someone who knew me indirectly from a mutual friend who had forwarded the email to her and she recognized my name because She had met my Husband and kids this past Sunday after Service which I missed because I was in the ER with Rachel cause she was sick. I was like "WOW, this world is so small!"

This person is nice and all, but it is funny cause you can send an email message and people can track you down (even innocently) because others forward emails with your original message. I always cut the extra forwards out when I forward a message but it is just funny how easy and simple something like an email can lead right back to you.

Being online is fun but it can be a breeding ground for predators and freaks. It made me think about this topic again this morning because I always have my signature line in my emails which has my ebay name, and webshots and webstore and this forum in the links.

This is a person who I would loev to meet actually because we have our Christian faith in common and my husband remembered her right away cause she knew some of our friends who moved to her congragation from ours.

I am just gonna be a Momma for a second and say "Be Careful out there." :D

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  • 1 month later...

I also have a MySpace account as well, and use it to find old friends from elementary, junior and high schools. It's been so wonderful to re-connect with my old friends!

I do completely agree that MySpace needs to be have stricter security procedures in place. Although MySpace has an age restriction policy, many kids get around it by lying about their birthdate. So it really is vitally important that, if a child does have a MySpace, that the parents constantly monitor it. I have heard that schools have gotten involved in monitoring students' MySpace profiles too.

In June, MySpace did implement new security procedures to protect the privacy of members. They now allow the MySpacer to set their profile to "private" so that the only people who can view your profile are your friends. And the only way people can find you is if they know your name or your email address. I get around that by initials in my name and an email account that I use only for MySpace. I really don't want people I don't know sending me friend requests. Like I said, I only use it to keep in touch with current friends and re-connect with old ones.

Another thing parents of MySpacers should check on (not just their profile) but their bulletins and what groups they belong to. I think this is where most people end up meeting strangers is on the groups. So it's important to monitor the groups your child belongs to and read the bulletins they post and receive. The profile may look innocent, but the groups and bulletins may not be.

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  • 2 months later...

I adore MySpace! It has been an amazing place to reconnect with people in my life that are all over the world.

As a mother:

There are many ways to disguise yourself or your child on myspace so that they cant be found by anyone. Don't use your Name! Never put you phone number or address information anywhere. Myspace has a number of excellent security features to protect their young users.

The answer isnt to shut it down. You need to educate your children. MySpace is no more dangerous than sending your child out in public. If you teach them not to talk to strangers and they correct ways to present themselves then they wont be in any danger.

Predators are everywhere. You can't stop that. All the bad press regarding bad things people have done has given MySpace a bad rep that is undeserved.

Many of the issues that have arisen are purely the fault of the victims not being smart or educated about how their personal information can be used to hurt them. It's a shame to see 13 year old children lying about their ages and posting inappropriate pictures of themselves to draw attention. Parents should be monitoring their internet use. If a predator can get on Myspace and find a child and their information and use it to victimize these kids then their parents can get on and find them and what they have posted to ensure their safety. Don't blame MySpace for your individual laziness in protecting your own child.

As an Employer:

I think using MySpace as a way to evaluate an potential employee shouldnt be done without permission. However if a person doesn't have the sense about them to edit what they allow the public to view then it's their own fault.

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