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creativity as an anti-depressant


shamrockgirl18

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I wouldn't normally post something so personal on a hobby forum, but I've been a member here for years and I know there are some really wonderful people here. I wanted to post this in case there was anyone else here who can relate.

I struggle with depression. I don't know why exactly; it could be genetics, or my hypothyroidism, or maybe it's just my personality/star sign (I'm one of those moody Cancerian crabs) :-P. Whatever the cause, I use my hobbies and art as a way to stave off depression. I think alot of times it works pretty well, if I'm feeling kind of depressed or even just a little blue I can lose myself in a project for a little while and then at least I can be satisfied with the outcome.

The last couple of days have been especially dark though, and I have become self-aware enough that I can tell when it's getting really bad. One of the ways I can tell is that I lose interest in creating anything. Yesterday even though I knew I needed several things for projects, and my way home from work passes a Michael's, Hobby Lobby and 2 Joann's (sometimes I hit up all of them!) I had zero interest in going in to any of them. When I *don't* want to go into a craft store for supplies or mini's, I know it means something.

Have any of you used this hobby, or another creative outlet, as a way to deal with depression/pain/grief, etc? Has anyone else struggled with the loss of interest thing? I *know* that I will always love this hobby, but when I'm having a tough time, my interest in it disappears, which just makes me sadder.

I hope this makes sense.

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Without getting all political, You are not the only one feeling this way this week.  Doesn't matter if you are pro or con, I think everyone is a little off this week. Take a nap, watch old movies, stay away from the news and social media, tomorrow is another day. Your muse will come back. Promise.

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It does make sense, Erin.

I, too, struggle with depression and it usually helps to a degree when I do mini-ing. Then there are those very dark times, as you have stated, that there is absolutely no interest.

In April of 2015, my former fiance/DD's dad, passed away completely unexpected. Totally blew us all out of the water and nearly destroyed me and DD. At the time he passed, I was working on Sherman Arthur's Camper and I lost complete interest and still can't get back to it. Though, I have gotten back to making miniatures and small houses. I just can't find the interest in the camper now.

It did take a very long time though, before I could care enough to get back to my mini's. I was worried because I didn't have the interest; in mini's or life. With help and friends (and a daily dose of this forum) I have finally gotten back some interest. And the mini-ing does help.

I understand, I get it, I live it and I know where you are coming from. Hang in there! Seek help if you can. We are all still here and I will keep you in my prayers.

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Thank you both for your replies and words of support and encouragement. While I am not a very political person, seeing the divisiveness of this election for so long definitely has an impact. It's funny how social media sites like Facebook and Instagram started out being such a silly novelty, and now they have a huge impact on our psychology and our social interactions.

I am really glad to know that I am not the only person who struggles with this. 

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You are certainly not alone. In addition to national worries, a friend of mine died on Wednesday, and the only thing I've been able to write was an essay in her memory that I finally got down this morning. As far as miniatures, I keep telling myself I'll feel better if I do something, anything, so I've been making myself do tiny steps on the barn for my nephew. Even it's as simple as gluing on the doorknobs, when I'm done I can say there's one thing to check off, one thing finished that wasn't yesterday. I don't have a lot of inspiration, but there's a tiny bit of satisfaction in getting that one thing done. I've also forced myself outside to do yard work and get some fresh air and exercise.

And, as Sable said, I've spent some time tuning out. Watched all of The Crown on Netflix this week and my favorite rom com of all time, Return to Me, today. Watched Lin-Manuel Miranda on Ellen's show and laughed for the first time in days. 

Baby steps. And know we're here for you.

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Yes, minis have helped me deal with a lot of grief and find a creativity that I never knew existed, only hoped was there. Though it is a solitary activity, I have felt welcome in this forum and embraced - this has been very important because my primary reaction is withdrawal. When I have times that I cannot work on my projects, whether it is lack of energy, time or interest, I have come to trust that there is some part of my soul that is still subconsciously engaged so  I  have something positive to return to. 

Our projects will wait for us, they are patient and faithful to the flow of our individual creativity.

Take care.

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When I'm depressed I turn to 1:1 projects (I'm stitching a Walter Inglis Anderson tigers picture and crocheting a tablecloth) that don't require creativity on my part, but turn out as a result of following directions.  There is usually pleasure at seeing something lovely translate from a piece of paper that helps.

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Thank you so much for posting this, Erin.  I struggle with depression too and also find it so discouraging when I get to the point where I lose interest in the things that usually seem to help a bit.  I have been having a really rough time for the past couple years and had pretty much given up on most of the activities I had once enjoyed.  My husband encouraged me to try something new and I really randomly chose building a dollhouse.  I am just getting started on mine and I am really glad to have found this great group!  We recently moved to a rural area, I am a stay at home mom and kind of a loner anyways so I think it will be good for me to have some social interaction!  I actually just started a blog today too.  I think it might help to keep me accountable and not give up on this project when I get really down like I have so many times in the past.  I hope you a feeling better soon, take care and know you are definitely not alone in this.  

...also it's interesting to see that you suffer from hypothyroidism as well.  I was recently diagnosed with that too.

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I have found over the past couple years especially that I am very sensitive to negative information (from the news) and to over sharing people on Facebook. I had to nearly turn away from all of it. Guess what? I have not suffered a bit from not being "informed". As a matter of fact, since I  now determine what information to absorb, I am MUCH more centered. Whatever happened in Washington DC over the past couple years had ZERO effect on me and my life, and I expect that to continue. Let the world worry about the world, and you be in charge of your own. Don't let pothers influence what you think you need to worry about. Make 1 goal a day, and love yourself weather you accomplish it or not. Life is hard so be nice to yourself. 

It is awesome that you reached out, Erin! There are so many of us out here that struggle with anxiety/depression every day. We need to reach out and be here for each other - it really does help to know that people know exactly how you feel. For me, planning a new project always helps. If I have any $$ I start by buying something for it, and if not I just start looking at photos and making a new folder for ideas on the computer. I hope you find something good that you can focus on right now. I'm sending love and hugs to you now and every day sfter!

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I've been depressed since I was a child and I'm still going to therapy. I know Prozac used to help me a lot, but when I had to start taking the generic stuff, I backslid big time. The generic stuff just doesn't work for me. For now, I'm just slogging through day by day. I think working with miniatures would be very therapeutic, but some days I'm just too depressed to work on them. That's one of the main reasons my projects just don't seem to go anywhere.

I'm looking at coping strategies now with my therapist. She gave me something to read about having a stress bag, or something. So when I get stressed, I can turn to the things in the bad, like a chocolate bar or a picture, etc. While it sounds like a good idea, somehow my stresses about money and how and where I'm going to live in the future don't seem like they'd be curable with a chocolate bar. I ate a whole bag of potato chips last night and not only didn't they help, now I worry about gaining more weight. LOL

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I am also glad that this topic was started because I am also dealing with some issues after the infamous Tuesday night. I am so glad that last week I had started a house for my friend's grand daughter that are moving to Florida, because this week this project has helped me a lot to deal with the mixed emotions that I am feeling in the new country that was born on November 8th. I am Hispanic and even though I became a citizen of this country almost 20 years ago, I have been feeling unwanted and rejected since Tuesday. I am afraid and nervous all the time for me for what could happen in the near future to me, my immediate family and all the people in this country that are experiencing the same dark feelings. I never felt so weird before since I came here to leave. This is not right. I friend of mine (white american lady) told me last night that her adopted daughter (born in China) asked her if she had to go back to China! this is insane. Anyways, since I have to finish this house for my friend, I have forced myself to work on it and it has helped me a lot to keep my mind off the nightmare that we started to leave this week. I hope that time will help us relax a little and pretend that we can go on leaving with the ease that we did before Tuesday. Let's try to chase the clouds away! Thank you all for been here to support each other, it is very much needed now! Sorry, Vicki and Mary for your loses. 

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Such a thought provoking topic. Have been watching the political news with much interest and worry for Americans as well as the rest of the world. Regardless, hobbies are a stress release. Books on improving happiness do mention having hobbies to turn to. My husband went through some considerable grief caused by a sister (I worried constantly about him ending his life) and having my hobbies really gave me something else to think about, just a little comfort. Be grateful for these things. They may be 'trivial' but they are also immensely helpful.

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12 hours ago, shamrockgirl18 said:

I wouldn't normally post something so personal on a hobby forum, but I've been a member here for years and I know there are some really wonderful people here. I wanted to post this in case there was anyone else here who can relate.

I struggle with depression. I don't know why exactly; it could be genetics, or my hypothyroidism, or maybe it's just my personality/star sign (I'm one of those moody Cancerian crabs) :-P. Whatever the cause, I use my hobbies and art as a way to stave off depression. I think alot of times it works pretty well, if I'm feeling kind of depressed or even just a little blue I can lose myself in a project for a little while and then at least I can be satisfied with the outcome.

The last couple of days have been especially dark though, and I have become self-aware enough that I can tell when it's getting really bad. One of the ways I can tell is that I lose interest in creating anything. Yesterday even though I knew I needed several things for projects, and my way home from work passes a Michael's, Hobby Lobby and 2 Joann's (sometimes I hit up all of them!) I had zero interest in going in to any of them. When I *don't* want to go into a craft store for supplies or mini's, I know it means something.

Have any of you used this hobby, or another creative outlet, as a way to deal with depression/pain/grief, etc? Has anyone else struggled with the loss of interest thing? I *know* that I will always love this hobby, but when I'm having a tough time, my interest in it disappears, which just makes me sadder.

I hope this makes sense.

Complete sense and right now I'm there myself. Have to say though that this hobby has taken me through two cancers and although I now have a third I can still find solace when working. Some may have noticed my rather erratic behaviour recently (Didn't I tell you......I'm a master at understatement) and I think I've lost some good forum friends so it looks like it's time take stock. 

On the political side though.......No worry whatsoever. Your wonderful country is bigger than one man and you still have a multitude of sane individuals ready with a steadying hand!

Just my opinion!

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Mike, as you know, I understand where you're coming from, and that you are dealing with a double whammy of mess in your life full time.  This group is as much your family as it gets, so please accept that.  As for the rest of the "stuff", I am going to look for some very large safety pins to wear on my clothes for a while.  I lived in Florida a very long time before moving to Alabama, which would love to repeal any laws moving us out of the 19th Century, and in FL the last two governors have discovered that no matter how hard they tried or how much money they had, they couldn't buck the constitution; and our President-elect has already been offered a copy.  I am basically not a political person, but I am a retired RN with many years of the mental health profession behind me, so I'm far more interested in dealing with the effects of depression, rather than one or two more spectacular factors.

By the way, Mike, I ran across this site the other day:  http://www.dollshousespastandpresent.com/issue24march2015p8.htm and thought I'd share with the rest of the family.

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Any type of hands on activity can assist in settling a stressed out brain and nervous system. Could be exercises, music, crafts, dancing, hiking, minis, fine arts, and more. Tactile/sensory experiences do wonders. 

'Fraid I've been on this same carousel going up and down these past 2 yrs too. 

One day or one step at a time ....this too shall pass ...

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Thank you for the subject.  Because my 48-year-old son's life has been severely altered due to depression, combined with swings of mania, I have immersed myself into the world of NAMI (www. NAMI.org).  They have national, state, and county chapters throughout the United States and around the world.  This organization's mission is to educate and advocate for the millions of people and their families who suffer with mood and thought disorders --  everything from mild clinical depression to schizophrenia.  So much of their effort is centered on the goal of stopping the stigma that is associated with chemical imbalances -- to lead to the understanding that mental health conditions are illnesses, just like cancer or diabetes, and ought to be treated as such.  So all discussion and openness should be welcome.

That being said, I want to caution too much political debate here; there are other sites for that.  I will not respond to this conversation after this because I do not want to argue or debate political points.  Just suffice it that there are two sides and when one side is being favored, the other side has hurt feelings of being misunderstood.  Afterall, millions of Americans lived with being the "outsiders" the last 8 years.  I know personally that although my immediate family is multi-racial and multi-ethnic, political views were misinterpreted as being racially motivated and bigoted.  It hurt then and it hurts now.

So may we please keep this a "safe" place, share out hobby (and yes it is a great mood lifter and a healthy outlet), and at least here in this place do what we can to unite, accept our differences, and know that MOST of us truly do have good intentions?  What unites us is greater than what divides us.  I like what Mike said, "Our country is greater than any one man".  

Like I said, I will not continue the conversation about political issues and I hope I am not shunned here because of mine but if I am, so be it, and I will move on.

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My heart goes out to all of you. Depression, illness, loss of loved ones... This hobby pulls me through the really bad days and so do all of the folks I get to talk to and share this joy with. Thank you all - You'll be in my prayers.

Mike - please stay around. We need you here...

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14 hours ago, minilover62 said:

I am also glad that this topic was started because I am also dealing with some issues after the infamous Tuesday night. I am so glad that last week I had started a house for my friend's grand daughter that are moving to Florida, because this week this project has helped me a lot to deal with the mixed emotions that I am feeling in the new country that was born on November 8th. I am Hispanic and even though I became a citizen of this country almost 20 years ago, I have been feeling unwanted and rejected since Tuesday. I am afraid and nervous all the time for me for what could happen in the near future to me, my immediate family and all the people in this country that are experiencing the same dark feelings. I never felt so weird before since I came here to leave. This is not right. I friend of mine (white american lady) told me last night that her adopted daughter (born in China) asked her if she had to go back to China! this is insane. Anyways, since I have to finish this house for my friend, I have forced myself to work on it and it has helped me a lot to keep my mind off the nightmare that we started to leave this week. I hope that time will help us relax a little and pretend that we can go on leaving with the ease that we did before Tuesday. Let's try to chase the clouds away! Thank you all for been here to support each other, it is very much needed now! Sorry, Vicki and Mary for your loses. 

In these times, I thought it would help everyone to read this from another forum I am on:

From charolastra00:

"Because as a Jew, I will be the first person in line to "register" as a Muslim. You come for one of us, you come for all of us."

 

My reply:

"I'm an atheist and I'm here to tell you that you won't be standing alone."

 

From mightyqueen801:

"I'm Christian, and I'll be in line behind you."

 

Don't worry, Carmen. There's a lot of people who still haven't forgotten Germany and what happened to the Jewish people and other ethnic groups, and I'm here to say that if anything like that starts to happen in this country, it'll only be over my dead body.

 

*hugs*

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19 hours ago, minilover62 said:

I am afraid and nervous all the time for me for what could happen in the near future to me, my immediate family and all the people in this country that are experiencing the same dark feelings. I never felt so weird before since I came here to leave. This is not right.

Carmen, I want you to know that I understand what you're feeling and no, it's not right. But you're not alone, and if there's any way I can help, or stand up for you (or anyone else who's threatened or bullied), please tell me and I will. I am a wimp when it comes to defending myself, but as a former elementary teacher, I will go mama tiger on bullies. 

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16 hours ago, rodentraiser said:

Don't worry, Carmen. There's a lot of people who still haven't forgotten Germany and what happened to the Jewish people and other ethnic groups, and I'm here to say that if anything like that starts to happen in this country, it'll only be over my dead body.

 

 

11 hours ago, MaryKate said:

Carmen, I want you to know that I understand what you're feeling and no, it's not right. But you're not alone, and if there's any way I can help, or stand up for you (or anyone else who's threatened or bullied), please tell me and I will. I am a wimp when it comes to defending myself, but as a former elementary teacher, I will go mama tiger on bullies. 

Thank you Kelly and Mary! this means the world to me! You made me feel a lot better already. Yesterday was my 54th birthday anniversary and your support was the best present I had! Hugs, hugs, hugs!

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I know I've always done better work when struggling through some event or situation.  My muses seem to abound whenever I'm troubled.  I know I really tested their stamina a few years ago, though.  When I had gotten back on even keel, my projects were not as inspired, some didn't turn out well at all, some were never completed.

I imagined them recouping in a cabana on a tropical beach, drinking mojitos, (because they know I hate those!), absorbing the rays of the sunlight, storing it in reserve so they have enough to bring to me should my mind get too cloudy, again.

They always seem to know when I need them.  I've never been able to just call them up.  They won't work for me that way!  One will stop by and check on me occasionally, though, to plant an idea, or give me a quick tip, usually while I'm asleep in the middle of the night!  Many a project has been started in the wee hours of the morning.

I understand it may sound silly to talk about muses like this.  Especially when someone is suffering with mental health issues.  My daughter has suffered with depression, anxiety and panic attacks over the past ten years.  She became incapacitated by them when she began her second year in college, she left school and moved back home.  Although my bouts with depression are situational, her issues are because of a chemical imbalance.  She became agoraphobic, and in her darkest days she became monophobic, and couldn't be left at home alone, so my husband and I had to coordinate schedules so one of us would always be with her. 

Through all this time, she continued to struggle and try to finish her degree!  Then, The University of Houston classified her as a disabled student, under a new guideline, due to her mental health issues and they worked to "enable" her to finish her degree.  Which she did!

After years of weekly counseling sessions, a few out-patient group therapy sessions, one horrible full week in a mental hospital, and tweaking and retweaking medications, she is able to cope better and is trying to function in the real world.

She got married last December and now lives with her husband in a small town in England.  Houston is a bit overwhelming for her, but they're coming over next week for Thanksgiving!

She'll be 30 years old in April.  Even though all seems well now, my husband and I felt a sadness as we watched her lose ten years of fully living her young adult life.  Friends, and even some family members, didn't understand and some insisted she was taking advantage of us, or, worse, we were enabling her.  I know it's easy for those on the outside to imagine they would somehow find a quick solution, while those of us on the inside have faced the fact that it's no one's fault.  We couldn't just "deal with it", we learned how to "cope with it".

One last thing, if it had't been for the ACA, I don't know how we would have been able to financially handle the expenses of her care.  After all, she wasn't a full time student, she wasn't able to get a job.  Being able to keep her on our insurance until she was 26 helped out tremendously.  After that, we secured coverage for her through the ACA, which would have been impossible to do if insurance companies could have denied coverage because of a pre-exhausting condition.  

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Thank you everyone for your responses. It is a comfort to know I am not the only one who struggles with this. Depression has such a huge impact of my life, and while I am able to get control over it much of the time, when it gets bad it begins affecting my work, and my marriage, and my health and pretty much everything. Although I think I am feeling the same mixture of emotions as many others following the election, the event that actually triggered this last bad episode is something that happened at work.

Usually I get along great with my co-worker, and we've become friends- she's come to my birthday party and also my son's birthday party before.. But the other day she interrupted me while I was speaking to another staff member, and basically talked over my head like I'm a child: like "Well, Erin can't do that because Erin needs to.  .  ." even though I was right beside her. I was kind of shocked that she would be so rude as to interrupt me mid-conversation, and then belittle me, in front of another staff member and the students who were still in the room. When I tried to talk to her about it, she kept justifying her interrupting me like "Well I could see where the conversation was going" instead of even acknowledging that interrupting someone is rude, and belittling me like that was unprofessional.

I know that probably doesn't seem like a huge deal, but I just couldn't believe it happened and then I couldn't believe she was justifying it. I would never treat a co-worker, let alone a friend, in such a rude manner. So that incident made work really awkward and uncomfortable, and I was already having some issues before that.

Now I am dreading going to work tomorrow. I had been working on my Fairy Library as a surprise for her/the library (to keep on permanent display) and now trying to finish that project just isn't fun anymore.

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